"the melancholic is aware that he has suffered the loss of a person, 'he knows whom he has lost but no what he has lost in him." In this sense the melancholic is unaware of what he has lost in in himself as a consequence of losing the object."

This raises an interesting point-- more terrifying than losing an object, is not understanding precisely what has been lost. The concept of loss is clear--in the sense that the object is gone, but what exactly has been lost in the self is unclear. The need to adjust to the loss and reduce pain in the self is necessary.

Ogden writes "accusations the melancholic heaps upon himself represent unconsciously displaced attacks on the loved object." In this sense, the need for punishment in the self can be severe. There is a blurring between the self and the other--whom are we punishing?

"The internal world of the melancholic is powerfully shaped by the wish to hold captive the object shaped by the wish to hold captive the object in the form of an imaginary substitute for it--the ego-identified-with-the object. The internalization of the object renders the object forever captive to the melancholic and at the same time renders the melancholic endlessly captive of it."